Liam is a spirited child, always has been and always will be. I’ve listened to other people who’ve had the responsibility, and what should have been the privilege, of educating and caring for my son voice their complaints about his unruly and uncooperative behavior. At first it felt hurtful to only hear the negatives. I knew how smart he was and how sensitive.
If you couldn’t keep up with him or if your patience was low that day, you were in for a miserable experience. He was full of energy at all times, I think even while he was sleeping! Add him to a group of other little kids and his energy would only increase. By the end of kindergarten, he was extremely frustrated in school. Still, I knew about those small moments of joy when he felt happy or really engaged in constructive learning and playtime.
I read recently somewhere that first born boys end up with two-thirds of the toxins from their mothers in utero. Toxins like lead and mercury that can affect that boy’s behavior later on. A boy like my first born son, Liam. Was this the cause of his hyperactivity, or was it something else, or a combination of a bunch of other things? Was it his diet, inferior social skills, a cry for attention, allergies, bad parenting, asthma, food intolerances, autism, lack of structure at home, sensory issues or ADHD? What else was there? I didn’t know, but I was determined to find out.
Since Liam’s first month at preschool, I have been on a search for answers. I needed information from our pediatrician and advice of friends. I needed support from my husband and family to find ways to help Liam. I scoured books and websites that offered tips, and even researched scientific data for real evidence-based explanations. I don’t have all my answers yet, but I’m learning as I go like all parents! It’s certainly been a roller coaster ride, but sometimes it’s smooth sailing, albeit rarely. I will cherish those rare but rewarding moments because Liam is the kind of kid who’s so easy to love but hard to raise!
. She explains temperament, personality, and different reactions to stress. The bulk of the book has to do with understanding and succeeding in our relationships with different temperament types. Throughout the book she uses her own categories for four main temperaments: Owl, Hare, Butterfly, and Tortoise. I tend to shy away from such divisions, but I notice these names are easily remembered and quite useful. I’m mostly Owlish. Now I know why I clam up around Butterfly types and become frustrated by bossy Hares. More importantly, I see situations that I normally blame on myself differently and, thanks to hundreds of hints Karyn shares, have more constructive ways to deal with them.
. I must have read a hundred parenting books and in too many I find finger wagging about particular “rules” that must be followed. Bruce doesn’t go there. He offers stories and metaphors, giving us ways to understand ourselves and our children. Many of the stories he shares come from his professional experience working with troubled kids. Others come from literature, films, and lessons he’s learned in his own life.
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that we’re fighting a hard-wired tendency. Our brains pay more attention to the